Next-Level Emotional Work
In 2021 I enrolled in a coach training program to learn about Positive Intelligence (PQ) and offer it as a resource to my clients. Reluctant at first, I tested the program and accompanying app myself. I found that after the 6-week intensive program I was able to bring more equanimity to my day and improve my own emotional regulation. As I tested the app and methods with current and past clients over the next 9 months, I realized an important emotion/work connection. I realized that emotion - and accessing positive emotions - was a missing key to getting traction on tasks that matter only to ourselves. Often referred to as Quadrant II tasks, it is imperative that leaders be able to make inroads here - the items that address organizational change beyond the scope of a single day. Getting traction on the strategic initiatives that no one else is asking for today or this week is the Achilles Heel for ADHD leaders. Those of us with ADHD are masterful at conjuring adrenaline to activate and complete tasks, tapping negative (urgency) neural networks but also awakening the voices of the harsh inner critic. Leadership and agency to make our own choices and facilitate paths for others live firmly in the positive neural networks of the brain. Neuroscience supports this. I’m finding that the PQ program is a final piece to the puzzle of a comprehensive coaching program for my business owners and leaders. I am also realizing that PQ can help individuals with ADHD better regulate emotions. The PQ program can also be a bit of a challenge to engage with and complete. If you have ADHD and you choose to enroll in the PQ program with a coach consider a few things first.
Why is the Positive Intelligence 6-week program often challenging for individuals with ADHD?
Like most tools and apps that assess preferences or strengths (DISC, Myers Briggs) or rely on consistent engagement (GTD), the Positive Intelligence program is not designed for the neurodivergent brain. PQ assumes one can readily and quickly identify and evaluate emotions in the moment then 'pivot' to a Sage perspective. These moves are executive function intensive and when participants fail to perform these basic program practices in a consistent way they can feel like they are failing in general, inviting more Saboteur/Judge activity. Secondly, those of us with ADHD have little time or space to give to new initiatives that are not absolutely urgent. Here in lies a great irony. A program that helps to shift our dependency away from the Adrenaline Response Cycle and everything that is urgent will never be urgent itself. Having lots of external (and positive) supports like community and accountability is an absolute must.
Why the Positive Intelligence program can still be a valuable tool to boost emotional awareness and resilience, especially for leaders.
Part of why emotional regulation can be a challenge for those with ADHD is because emotions can be hard to identify and access, especially in a charged and stressful situation. How do you regulate something you are not accessing? How do you access something you are not seeing? I use PQ as a resource with all of my clients to boost their awareness of emotions 'in the room'. It gives individuals a useful prompt to identify patterns of behavior often driven by fear or anxiety or stress. For my clients, PQ can create the all important 'pause' to stop and consider what is informing a need or impulse to make a decision and approach decisions from a place of choice, agency, personal principles and curiosity.
It is imperative that leaders be able to make inroads here - the items that address organizational change beyond the scope of a single day.
PQ is not a panacea for all that ails you. I use it as a part of a comprehensive ADHD coaching program. Positive intelligence is not a substitute for doing one’s emotional work that we often discuss on the Translating ADHD Podcast. A lifetime of living with undiagnosed ADHD - a life questioning our motives and trying to explain the unexplainable can have a traumatizing effect. I find PQ is most beneficial once the individual has done their own emotional work and has started to manage their ADHD more effectively.
If you have ADHD, consider doing the PQ program with a trained ADHD coach who understands how ADHD informs the PQ experience. If you are an ADHD leader or decision-maker consider signing up for my Equanimity Course - A group coaching course that folds the Positive Intelligence 6-week program into leading more effectively with ADHD.